The mailman's retirement
It was the mailman's last day on the job after 35 years
of carrying the mail through all kinds of weather to the
same neighbourhood.
When he arrived at the first house on his route he was greeted
by the whole family there, who congratulated him and sent
him on his way with a big gift envelope.
At the second house they presented him with a box of fine
cigars. The folks at the third house handed him a selection
of terrific fishing lures.
At the fourth house he was met at the door by a strikingly
beautiful woman in a revealing negligee. She took him by
the hand, gently led him through the door, and led him up
the stairs to the bedroom where she blew his mind with the
most passionate love he had ever experienced.
When he had had enough they went downstairs, where she fixed
him a giant breakfast: eggs, potatoes, ham, sausage, blueberry
waffles, and fresh-squeezed orange juice. When he was
truly satisfied she poured him a cup of steaming coffee.
As she was pouring, he noticed a dollar bill sticking out
from under the cup's bottom edge. "All this was
just too wonderful for words, " he said, "but
what's the dollar for?"
"Well, " she said, "last night, I told
my husband that today would be your last day, and that we
should do something special for you. I asked him what to
give you."
He said, "Fuck him, give him a dollar."
The lady then said, "The breakfast was my idea."
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