The Great Irish Bank Robbery
Excerpted from an article about a bank robbery which appeared
in the Dublin Times (metropolitan edition, page 2A) on
2 March 1999:
Once inside the bank shortly after midnight, their efforts
at disabling the internal security system got underway
immediately. The robbers, who expected to find one or two
large safes filled with cash and valuables, were surprised
to see hundreds of smaller safes scattered throughout
the bank.
The robbers cracked the first safe's combination,
and inside they found Only a bowl of vanilla pudding. As
recorded on the bank's audio-tape system, one said,
"At least we'll get a bit to eat, "
The robbers opened up a second safe, and it also contained
nothing but vanilla pudding. The process continued until
all the safes were opened.
They found not one pound sterling, a diamond, or an ounce
of gold. Instead, all the safes contained covered bowls
of pudding.
Disappointed, the robbers made a quiet exit, each leaving
with nothing more than a queasy, uncomfortably full stomach.
The newspaper headline read:
IRELAND'S LARGEST SPERM BANK ROBBED EARLY THIS MORNING.
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