How to make a lady to Ejaculate like man
Female Ejaculation
From the book A New View of a Woman's Body
Copyright 1981, The Federation of Feminist Women's
Health Centers
Illustrated By: Suzann Gage, L Ac, RNC, NP
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Female Body Fluids
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Before discussing female ejaculation I will first address
female body fluids in general. Our society, as well as most
others, views all forms of liquid that are produced by the
female body with great disdain. Women are not permitted
to openly perform most normal bodily functions; it is not
seen as being feminine. Female body fluids are even considered
harmful by many; there are societies in which menstruating
women are thought to cause crops to fail and livestock to
die. This creates a significant barrier to sexual pleasure
for women.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Women are expected to maintain a dry pristine appearance
regardless of their current physical activity. Mothers
once told their daughters it was unwise to engage in sports,
as boys would see them sweaty and disheveled and this was
seen as unattractive. Today, deodorant and antiperspirant
ads drive home the idea, "Do not let them see you sweat."
Women are told they need special stronger deodorants made
just for them. Tampon and sanitary napkin advertising
stresses the products ability to conceal a woman's
menstruation from others more than their primary task
of absorbing menses. Most women would prefer to have their
fingernails ripped out one by one than be seen having an
"accident;" menstruating in public. There
are girls and women who learn to dislike the idea of urinating
in a public bathroom, holding their urine all day until
they get home. Are they perhaps afraid to be seen as less
than pure by others?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sweaty men are seen as sexual, virile. Their manhood is
measured by their ability to produce large quantities
of semen. They write their name in the snow with their urine
and see who can ejaculate the furthest. Men making a mess
with their ejaculate is seen as unavoidable, normal, and
is never questioned. It is even idolized in adult movies.
Men can ejaculate on the face, in the mouth, and on and in
the body of their partner and it is seen as normal. If a woman
gets her body fluids on her partner that is another story,
she has made a dirty mess. This is an interesting double
standard. If a man can cover his partner with his body fluids,
a woman should be able to do the same.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Female sexuality is marred by these unwritten laws. It
is hard to relax and enjoy sex if you are worried about sweating
heavily or producing too much vaginal lubrication. Women
who produce large quantities of vaginal lubrication,
sweat, and who ejaculate have been known to avoid sex rather
than expose their partner or themselves to these fluids.
Since women have no control over the release of these fluids
during sexual activities some avoid sex all together rather
than risk being seen as less than feminine by their partner.
Though a woman's desire for sex may increase during
her menstrual period she may not engage in sex during this
time because she fears she will make a mess of things and
is inherently undesirable. Social mores concerning female
body fluids can significantly restrict female sexuality
and pleasure.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Before a woman can learn to ejaculate, enjoy ejaculating,
and enjoy sex in general she must accept her bodily fluids
as normal. She must not question the nature or quantity
of her wetness, be it sweat, vaginal lubrication, menses,
ejaculate, or urine. These fluids are a normal and natural
part of women's lives. There is nothing that is inherently
bad about them. A woman cannot allow herself to ejaculate
and experience potentially earth-shattering orgasms
if she cannot let go when the pressure or urge to ejaculate
arises. Ladies, give yourself permission to get wet and
messy. Give yourself permission to have fun and enjoy sex.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
As a result of the taboos concerning female body fluids,
the main motivation behind the studies into female ejaculation
appears to be the determination of whether or not the expelled
fluid is urine. Some believe that if a woman ejaculates
a liquid that is not urine like a man, it is normal and she
cannot help it, she is normal. If she ejaculates urine they
suggest she has a medical problem and is not normal. Authors
who write about the G spot strive to persuade their readers
that female ejaculate is not urine. Why this great importance
over the exact nature of this fluid squirting from women's
bodies? Does it really matter whether it is urine or ejaculate?
If a woman gets a thrill out of squirting urine at the moment
of orgasm, are we to say she has a problem? Do we mean to take
this pleasure away from her? If a woman squirts urine at
the moment of orgasm, let her, if she ejaculates uncontrollably,
so be it. It is not our place to judge a woman's sexual
pleasure.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A Female Prostate?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Click on Image to Enlarge
From the book Eve's Secrets By Josephine Lowndes Sevely.
Copyright 1987 Josephine Lowndes Sevely
2.4cm equals approxitmately 1 inch
During early fetal development both male and female fetuses
start out being physically female; prior to the male fetus
being able to produce its own hormones. The production
of testosterone in male fetuses is not triggered until
around the seventh or eighth week of fetal development;
by the presence of the Y chromosome. This necessitates
that female fetuses initially have rudimentary organs
that could develop into either "male" or "female"
reproductive and sexual organs. As a result, the tissue
that develops into the male prostate gland also exists
in women.
From the book: The Ciba Collection of Medical Illustrations:
Volume 2, Reproductive System
Prepared by: Frank H. Netter, M.D.
Copyright 1954 and 1965 Ciba Pharmaceutical Company.
The female prostate is actually a collection of paraurethral
glands. These glands surround the female urethra on all
sides and empty into it through many small ducts. "Paraurethral"
simply means "near the urethra." These glands
can be seen in the two illustrations shown above. (Additional
illustrations from the book Eve's Secrets by Josephine
Lowndes Sevely can be seen in the Anatomy section.) The
paraurethral glands are also called "Skene's
Glands." The largest of these glands, there may be
as many as thirty or more, are located near the urethral
orifice and may in some cases open into the vulva. The quantity,
size, and placement of these glands varies from woman to
woman. During sexual arousal the paraurethral glands
fill with fluid and may in some cases be felt through the
vaginal wall; as demonstrated in the illustration at the
top of the page. These glands produce the same alkaline
fluid as the male prostate.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Urethral Sponge, Skene's Glands,
Paraurethral Glands, or Prostate?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Since the female pararethral glands do not have the same
structure as the male prostate, it is not really appropriate
to say women have a prostate gland. The female paraurethral
glands do not form together into a single gland that drains
through two ducts into the urethra as in the case of the male.
The term "female prostate" is often employed
since people already have some familiarity with the "male
prostate" and can make a correlation between the
two, even if they do not believe you. If you say "paraurethral
glands, " people usually have no idea as to what you
are talking about. There are enough similarities between
the two that it not a completely inappropriate statement
to make, and simplifies the explanation, but not the debate.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
There has been an ongoing debate concerning the presence
of the female paraurethral glands for hundreds of years.
Even before the paraurethral glands were observed, the
fluid produced by them had been known to exist since perhaps
the dawn of time. Female ejaculation was once thought to
be required if conception was to occur; the mixing of the
male and female fluids was thought to result in conception.
Early investigators, 1700's to present, of human
anatomy have observed what appeared to them to be, two glands
that drained into the urethra, a female prostate, multiple
ducts that drained into the urethra, a mixture of small
and large ducts and glands, or no ducts and glands at all.
Why such varying observations and opinions? Primarily
the differences in their observations can be attributed
to the fact the earlier observers did not have the same type
or level of education, and the anatomy of the paraurethral
glands vary from woman to woman. Add to this, the language
barrier and confusion caused by translations and passage
of time. It is likely they were all correct, given the circumstances
of their observations.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
In the above illustration by Dr. Netter, he has labeled
some of the glands as para-urethal or pari-urethral and
the ones located closest to the urethral orifice as Skene's
glands. The two glands located closest to the vulva are
often called "Skene's glands." This is
because Skene oberserved only two glands and named them
after himself; believing he was the first to observe them.
His description of the paraurethral glands has taken hold,
as well as his name, even though others had already known
about the existence of a female prostate, or multiple paraurethral
glands, for at least one hundred years prior. As can been
seen in the illustration shown below, others have supported
the two gland theory ever since. The difference in the names
used to describe these glands and their perceived quantity
has led to some confusion. The paraurethral glands and
Skene's glands are though the same thing.
Click on Image to See Full Size
From the book Human Sex Anatomy
By Robert Latou Dickinson M.D., F.A.C.S.
Copyright 1949, The Williams & Wilkins Company
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What Causes the Swelling?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
In the illustration shown at the top of the page, the tissue
surrounding the urethra is labeled as the "urethral
sponge;" the paraurethal glands are imbedded in
this tissue. The tissue surrounding the female urethra
is thought by many to be the same as that surrounding the
male urethra; corpus spongiosum. The tissue surrounding
the female urethra fills with blood during sexual arousal,
as is the case in the male. This results in the tissue becoming
firm to the touch. If the end result is the same, the cause
would have to be the same, this would seem to make sense.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I propose this may not be the case. The corpus spongiosum
tissue of the penis does not extend as far as the prostate
gland. The female inner labia and vestibule glands are
comprised of corpus spongiosum and would have formed the
tissue surrounding the urethra as it passed through the
penis had the genetic coding specified male, not female.
If we have already accounted for the erectile tissue in
women, how can it also surround the paraurethral glands;
especially since this is not the case in men? To my untrained
eyes, two photographs in Sevely's book showing the
cross-sections of the male and female urethras do not appear
to show the same type tissue surrounding the male and female
urethras. For these photographs to show the same types
of tissue would they not have to be cross-sections of the
male and female prostate? I believe these photographs
show the male corpus spongiosum and the female paraurethral
glands. One would not then expect to see the same type tissue.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The female urethra is part of the vagina, not a totally separate
organ. The urethra passes through the tissue of the vagina.
The vagina and urethra cannot be separated as is usually
indicated in anatomy illustrations. In addition, the
vagina has a rich blood supply and fills with blood during
sexual arousal. This increased blood flow has already
been found to cause vaginal lubrication; sometimes in
significant amounts. If the tissue surrounding the urethra
is engorged with blood, is it not possible the paraurethral
glands kick into high gear and fill with prostatic fluid?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I propose the discernable swelling surrounding the female
urethra is caused by the accumulation of alkaline fluid
in the paraurethral glands; not solely by the swelling
of erectile tissue. The tissue surrounding the urethra
is rich in blood vessels; as the below illustrations clearly
show. The illustration from Sevely's book shown above
reveals a large collection of glands, one being quite large,
a short distance into and above the vagina. This would perhaps
account for the small area that swells and projects into
the vagina, and that in some cases can be felt through the
vaginal wall. It may also account for the concept of a "G
spot."
NOTE: The clitoris surrounds the urethra on three sides,
as does the vestibule glands and bulbocavernous muscles,
along the outer third of the urethra. The clitoris and vestibule
glands also swell with blood during sexual arousal.
From the book: The Ciba Collection of Medical Illustrations:
Volume 2, Reproductive System
Prepared by: Frank H. Netter, M.D.
Copyright 1954 and 1965 Ciba Pharmaceutical Company.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Do All Women Ejaculate?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The latest research indicates the possibility that all
women produce female ejaculate, even if they are not aware
of it. The expelled or released fluid is not urine, it is
an alkaline liquid secreted by the paraurethral glands.
The paraurethral glands produce an enzyme called prostatic
acid phosphatase (PAP) and glucose (a sugar). These substances
have been found in much higher quantities in female ejaculate
than are found in urine. The fluid from the paraurethral
glands is released or expelled during orgasm as a result
of pelvic muscle contractions. Stimulation of the G spot
or paraurethral gland is not required for this to occur
and it may occur in the absence of orgasm. The glands may
simply overflow with fluid and as a result it seeps out.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Urine or Ejaculate?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I have already explained above that the paraurethral glands
do in fact produce an alkaline fluid. In some cases, all
of the fluid emitted from a woman's urethra is ejaculate.
In other cases, the liquid is likely a mixture of ejaculate
and urine, or only urine. There has not been sufficient
research done to clarify exactly what the fluid is, in every
instance. The research that has been done often provided
conflicting results. There is research that concludes
it is only ejaculate or that it is mostly urine with traces
of ejaculate. It is clear though that most if not all women
produce the alkaline fluid in at least small quantities.
It may seep out versus be expelled and be confused with sweat
and vaginal lubrication.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Is a woman urinating or ejaculating? This is a question
that cannot be answer outside a medical lab. There is no
accurate way of determining whether a woman is voluntarily
squirting urine, experiencing incontinence, or ejaculating
at the moment of orgasm. These fluids all exit the body through
the urethra so the visible source is the same for them all.
I'm not aware of any color, taste, or scent test that
can be applied to the expelled liquid that will accurately
distinguish them from one another. We are left with no other
choice than to see them as indistinguishable, the same.
NOTE: In her book The Clitoral Truth Rebecca Chalker states
a simple smell test will tell you if it is urine or ejaculate.
If the fluid has a acrid scent, it is urine. This may be true
but what difference does or should it make? My concern is
that if a woman or her partner decides she is squirting urine
then they may see it as undesirable; inappropriate. My
position is, it really does not matter what type of fluid
is expelled and being concerned about it may create a barrier
to pleasure for women. It is okay to be curious about these
fluids, that is only natural, but it is not appropriate
to judge them.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
If you read the information presented on the website of
Dr. Gary Schubach, he states his research has shown the
majority of the fluid that is expelled originates in the
bladder, but this expelled fluid is not quite normal urine.
In his research, the womans bladder was emptied using
a catheter prior to orgasm. During orgasm, a catheter was
in place and connected to a urine collection bag. Analysis
of the fluid expelled during orgasm is the basis for his
claim. There is one flaw with his methodology; the bladder
sphincter is normally closed. If it were not, urine would
simply flow out and there would be no "ejaculation"
of fluid. What is the significance of creating an artificial
passage and collecting the fluid expelled from the bladder
during pelvic muscles contractions? During orgasm, does
this passage normally exists even if only momentarily?
Some claim otherwise or that fluid enters the bladder rather
than exiting from it. Even if fluid does collect in the bladder
during sexual arousal, would it normally be expelled during
orgasm? Are all women the same or are there "normal
variations?" Dr. Schybach's research is still
important but it provides only part of the picture. Research
into female ejaculation is still in its infancy so I am sure
we can find flaws in all the studies when looking back at
them, especially as new research becomes available.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Women who expel fluid during orgasm report the color, smell,
consistency, and even taste, varies from one occurrence
to the next. (It is safe for a person to taste their own ejaculate,
and for couples who already exchange body fluids, but not
for couples needing to practice safe sex.) Some have found
their menstrual cycle influences the type of fluid expelled.
What you eat is likely to have an effect on it, as will how
much liquid you have consumed. There are women who report
that it is sometimes clear and odorless, other times thick
and pungent. Others report that it sometimes looks and
smells like urine. It is safe to say, most women's ejaculate
will vary with time, even during a single sexual episode.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
How Much Liquid is Released?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The amount of fluid released by the paraurethral glands
is reported to vary from a couple drops to almost two cups,
15 ounces [444 ml]. Two cups is a lot of liquid,
can it really be that much? The paraurethral glands surround
the urethra in an area about half an inch [1.25 cm]
in diameter and 1.5 inches [3.8 cm] in length.
An area of this size when filled with water can hold 0.163
oz [4.8 ml]. Even if the glands were to swell
to fill an area 1 inch (2.5 cm] in diameter and 2 inches
[5 cm] in length they could still only hold
0.87 oz [26 ml]. If the paraurethral glands
can store less than 1 oz of liquid where does the other 14
ounces come from? Keep in mind these glands will continue
to produce fluid for as long as a woman is sexually aroused,
and as result a woman could produce more than 1 oz of ejaculate
if multiple, or a continuous, releases of fluid occurred.
One study found women produced 30 to 50 ccs [7 to 15
oz][30 to 50 ml] in 30 to 50 seconds.
To produce this much fluid the glands would need to fill
and empty once or more times per second. That means the paraurethral
glands would need to produce 3 to 5 ccs [0.23 to 0.30
oz][3 to 5 ml] per second on average.
If the paraurethral glands do have the capacity to fill
and empty at a rapid rate, that would explain the large volumes
of fluid measured by some investigators. It would also
mean the longer a woman's orgasm lasted, the more she
would ejaculate; as is often the case. If this is all true,
it is possible for a woman to ejaculate a considerable amount
of fluid without it being urine or liquid from the bladder.
Obviously, more research needs to be done to clarify this;
perhaps using ultrasound to observe the glands during
sexual arousal and orgasm.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Who Has A G Spot?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Defining the "Grafenberg spot" or "G
spot" is not a simple task. Most would simply say it
is an area of high sensitivity located within the paraurethral
structures. The problem with this definition is, the sensitivity
of this area is not likely to be constant. If a woman is not
sexually aroused, she may not have a G spot. If the same woman
is highly aroused and her paraurethral glands are engorged
with prostatic fluid, she may have a very distinct G spot.
There are perhaps women who are not aware of a G spot even
though they ejaculate and experience a more intense orgasm
if their paraurethral glands are stimulated. It is for
these reasons that it is important for people not to form
a concrete definition of what a G spot is. Each woman will
create her own definition, one valid only for her.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The next question for debate concerns whether or not "all"
women have a G spot or G crest. This is not really a valid question.
The G spot indicates the "sensitivity" of a
non-specific area of tissue. The "G-Crest"
defines the swollen "condition" of the paraurethral
glands during sexual arousal. There are no anatomical
structures with these names. This is in part why people
have trouble finding it. What one needs to look for are the
paraurethral glands. All women have these and it is likely
that they all produce at least a small amount of fluid that
may seep out and mix with the other fluids that are present
in much larger quantities.
NOTE: As in the case of men, these glands can become infected
and cause pain and discomfort during urination. Women
who experience chronic urinary infections or pain should
consult with a doctor to see if they may have the female equivalent
of "prostatitis."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
How Do You Locate the
Paraurethral Glands?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
How does one locate these paraurethral glands? Quite simply,
you locate the urethra. The urethral opening is located
directly above the vaginal opening, below the clitoris.
You can see it with your bare eyes; though it can be hard to
find in some cases. The urethra extends back from the urethral
opening, urethral meatus, into the body, along the front
or upper wall of the vagina for 1.5 to 2 inches [3.8
to 5 cm]. While you can see the urethral opening,
you cannot see the paraurethral glands themselves. Using
a speculum, you might be able to see the swollen paraurethral
glands projecting into the vagina through the vaginal
wall. The video mentioned below shows this. Adventures
people may want to slip a finger or two into their own or their
partner's vagina while they urinate so they can feel
the urine passing through the urethra. This will help you
locate its exact position. Once you have located the urethra,
you have a bases for seeking out a possible area along it
that is highly sensitive to stimulation, a G spot.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
In her book Female Ejaculation & The G-Spot Deborah
Sundahl presents information about the anatomy and location
of the female prostate gland gathered by Dr. Zaviacic and
published in 1999. He found 70% of women have a ramp-shaped
prostate gland where the thickest part is situated near
the urethral opening, 15% have a ramp-shaped prostate
where the thickest part is located near the bladder, 7%
have a prostate gland that is thickest near the middle of
the urethra, and 8% of women have a "rudimentary prostate"
that has few ducts and glands. This means one must explore
the full length of the urethra, 1.5-2 inches (3.8-5 cm)
along the upper wall of the vagina, when attempting to locate
the G-Spot. This research also indicates more than 90%
of women have a well defined prostate gland, even if they
cannot locate it or do not ejaculate.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The Importance of
Clitoral Stimulation!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The clitoris probably holds the key to female ejaculation
for most women. If the clitoris is not stimulated a woman
is less likely to become highly aroused. If she is not highly
aroused, her paraurethral glands will not fill with fluid.
If her paraurethral glands are not swollen she may not have
a G spot. If her clitoris is not stimulated she is less likely
to reach orgasm, preventing the rhythmic contractions
of the pelvic muscles that expel and release the ejaculate.
So quite simply, before you can go exploring for the G spot,
you must master clitoral stimulation beforehand. There
are women who are orgasmic and ejaculate when their G spot
or vagina alone is stimulated, this ability is likely to
be discovered accidentally versus intentionally.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
How Do You Stimulate the
Paraurethral Glands?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
So now that you have an idea as to the location of the G spot,
how do you stimulate it? The most versatile tools to use
are your fingers. They are firm but flexible. They have
feeling and give you feedback. For the solo explorer though,
fingers can be a problem. They just are not very long. Plus,
if one hand is stimulating your clitoris, it limits access
to your vagina with your other hand. So in addition to fingers,
dildos and/or vibrators are usually required for finding
and stimulating the G spot. (I will refer to both vibrators
and dildos as dildos for the sake of convenience) Notice
I used the plural 'dildos', not the singular 'dildo'.
There is a considerable chance that you may have to try many
different dildos to find the right one.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Choosing a Dildo
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
How do you pick out a dildo for G spot stimulation? Trial
and error. The dildos that do have a good success rate are
those that are curved near the tip, called G spot stimulators,
and penis shaped dildos with a prominent ridge at the junction
of the glans and shaft. Some women find hard plastic dildos
work best, others, soft flexible ones. Some find that makeshift
dildos work great, cucumbers, brush handles, mirror handles,
etc. Others prefer slim dildos that they can be directed
at a specific area within their vagina, others prefer their
vagina to be filled and stretched to the maximum. If you
are going to buy a dildo to use for G spot stimulation, be
prepared to buy and try many. Any woman who is seriously
considering using dildos needs to be aware that she will
most likely have a collection of favorites, versus one
special one. As women's moods change, so do their dildo
needs. While women often start out with one, many soon find
they have a drawer full of them. Some women prize their collections.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To Pee or Not to Pee
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Since the physical act of female urination is so similar
to female ejaculation, many women have found erotic enjoyment
in urinating during sex, solo and with a partner. Women
seeking to learn to ejaculate may find themselves squirting
urine versus actually ejaculating, not being able to tell
them apart. This is because both urination and ejaculation
require a woman to be able to let go and relax her bladder
sphincter and her pelvic muscles. If you keep your bladder
sphincter closed and tighten your pelvic muscles, you
cannot urinate or ejaculate. Women seeking to ejaculate
are advised to push out when the urge to urinate or ejaculate
comes over them at the point of orgasm. Doing this gives
your body permission to ejaculate, but it also gives your
body permission to urinate. You have no control over which
occurs. You will just be aware of the physical sensations
that occur. The sensations of both may be pleasant and indistinguishable.
Hence learning to urinate intentionally at the point of
orgasm may help a woman learn to ejaculate.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Learning to be able to urinate at the point of orgasm is likely
to be easier done alone than with a partner. You will probably
find it easier to relax, and you wont be as concerned about
the resulting wetness. Doing this in the bathtub has some
advantages, one you do not have to worry about the wetness,
soaking in warm water will help relax you, and cleanup is
a snap. Drink a couple glasses of water a short while before
starting; allow your bladder to fill. It does not need to
feel full, but you do not want it to be empty either. Lie back
in the tub, or lay on several towels on your bed. Start to
masturbate. Caress your clitoris. Slipping your fingers
or a dildo into your vagina may feel nice. You do not need
to necessarily move them back and forth inside your vagina.
Allow the sexual buildup to occur slowly. Practice tightening
and relaxing your pelvic muscles, commonly called Kegel
exercises.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Think about the act of urinating, of letting go. Allowing
your bladder to fill will result in you feeling the need
to urinate. The closer you are to the point of orgasm, the
stronger the urge to urinate is likely to become. Hold back
on your orgasm until you feel you cannot hold your urine
a second longer. At the point of orgasm press out and relax
your pelvic muscles, welcome the feeling of the urine escaping
from your bladder. The stronger the force behind the urine,
the greater the sensations are likely to be. So push and
try to squirt your urine. It takes practice to be able to
let go spontaneously, since you have been conditioned
to maintain strict control over your urination habits.
It may also help to vocalize the release, make some noise.
Intentionally crying out will help with the release. Scream
"YES."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Learning to Ejaculate
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Moving on to ejaculation only requires a couple slight
changes in technique. Empty your bladder first; you will
want to let go without a full bladder producing the pressure
or urge. The urge should still develop, just not be the result
of a full bladder. The urge to ejaculate may not occur without
there being stimulation of your paraurethral glands.
This is likely to require the use of a dildo if you are alone.
As you massage your clitoris, using your fingers or a dildo
stimulate your urethra by massaging the top of your vagina;
using only light pressure at first. Massage the full length
of your urethra, from the opening of your vagina back into
your vagina a couple inches. Keep up the clitoral massage.
Try different pressures and strokes. Massaging the urethral
opening may feel pleasant as well. Stimulating your urethra
may cause you to feel the need to urinate, as is desired.
Do not fight the urge; go with the flow, literally. Relax
and breathe deeply.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
If you find a spot that is highly sensitive, you may want
to concentrate solely on it, but you may find it is too sensitive
to stimulate directly. If your G spot is highly sensitive,
you may find you are only able to tolerate its stimulation
when you are very close to orgasm, when your pain threshold
has increased. Keep massaging your clitoris and urethra.
Continue to the point of orgasm. A slow build up, with lots
of teasing, may help produce the greatest urge and strongest
orgasm. When orgasm occurs, relax your bladder and press
out as if urinating. If you ejaculate you will likely feel
a new and strong sensation, if not, you will still experience
a strong orgasm, so nothing is lost. You may not be aware
of any increased wetness until after the orgasm has subsided.
Being able to ejaculate may take practice, even if you are
able to squirt urine during orgasm. It is not known whether
all women can ejaculate, so you just have to experiment.
In any event it should be pleasurable.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
With a Partner
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A woman's partner can bring her to an orgasm that includes
ejaculation. If a woman already knows she is capable of
ejaculating, she should let her partner know, not pray
that it will not happen again. She should discuss the increased
wetness that occurs with her partner; at least prepare
them for it. Hopefully they will see your ejaculations
as erotic. If they do not, reeducating them about female
fluids and ejaculation may persuade them to at least accept
the ejaculations as normal even if they do not like the associated
wetness.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
There is perhaps one big advantage to having a partner stimulate
you to orgasm when you are trying to ejaculate, they will
not stop the stimulation unless you tell them too. If you
are masturbating and you start to feel uncomfortable,
out of control, you will likely stop immediately. This
could prevent you from experiencing orgasm and ejaculation.
With a partner you can agree beforehand that they will not
stop, even if you say, "stop." (Doing this requires
using a "safe word" that indicates, "Stop!"
for real. This is a word you are not likely to say accidentally
during sex, without thinking about it.) If you find you
pull away, you can ask that they hold or follow you so you
cannot move away from the stimulation. Of course you should
only do these things if you really trust your partner, they
need to be forceful without going to far.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
How do you stimulate your partner's paraurethral
glands? Your hands provide excellent tools to use. The
best way to stimulate the inside of their vagina, along
the upper wall, is to create a hook with your index finger.
Imagine you want to signal to someone standing across the
room that you want them to come toward you. You turn your
hand palm up and signal with your index finger by making
a hook, curling it up and straightening it repeatedly.
You can do the same thing with one or two fingers inside the
vagina. Massaging the upper wall of the vagina, from the
opening back two inches. Start out with a very light touch.
Press your fingers up and toward the front, pointing toward
the pubic bone, or clitoris. Use the urethral opening as
a guide. Use a generous amount of lubrication; even if she
is dripping wet.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Start out by getting her aroused with manual and/or oral
clitoral stimulation. Continue the clitoral stimulation
as you massage her urethral glands. Ask your partner if
there is a specific spot or area that produces intense or
enjoyable sensations when you massage it, her G spot. As
you sense her getting closer to orgasm, apply a firmer touch,
if she enjoys it. Maintain a constant and steady rhythm.
Follow through, continue the massage up through her orgasm.
Then switch to a very light caressing touch as she comes
down from her orgasm. If she experiences multiple orgasms
her orgasms and ejaculations may become more intense,
and the amount of ejaculation may increase, the more orgasms
she has. If she orgasms with your fingers inside her vagina,
her vaginal muscles may squeeze them very tightly, do not
pull out; press in gently.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
You can also stimulate your partner to ejaculation using
a dildo. This requires more verbal communication as you
cannot feel exactly what the dildo is doing. She needs to
let you know what feels good, or bad. Some women may like
for the tip of the vibrator to be pointed at their urethra,
others may prefer a full feeling. The stretching and pressure
created by large dildos or an entire hand may stimulate
the urethra enough to cause an ejaculation, even if that
is not the intent.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A woman may also ejaculate during intercourse, with a penis
or a dildo in a harness. What does seem to work best are positions
that result in the penis or dildo stimulating the upper
wall of the vagina. Like when a woman's partner kneels
between her knees when she is on her hands and knees, or when
she is on top controlling the direction and force of the
thrusting. Some women may ejaculate during intercourse
without even trying; others may find it a challenge. It
is more likely if she already ejaculates frequently during
manual massage. Practice makes perfect.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Some Health Concerns
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Unfortunately, there can be some negative side affects
to massaging the urethra. The urethra is highly sensitive
and is easily irritated. Even normal intercourse can irritate
a woman's urethra, resulting in painful urination
and infection. This is especially true of virgins and women
with tense pelvic muscles as they are too tight, resulting
in there being too much friction between their vagina and
the thrusting penis or dildo. Intentionally stimulating
the urethra increases the chances of there being irritation
and infection. To help prevent infections and reduce the
chances of irritation, a woman should drink lots of water
and urinate just before and right after urethral stimulation,
or sex in general if you are prone to urinary tract infections.
Just release a little bit of urine before sex if you are trying
things with a full bladder. They also recommend women drink
cranberry juice, or take a cranberry supplement, as its
acidic level helps to ward off the bacteria that cause infections.
If you experience irritation, painful urination, or infection,
try using less pressure when massaging or stimulating
the urethra. The urethra may become accustomed to the stimulation
with time, but do not torture yourself, or inflict multiple
infections. Have fun, but do not hurt yourself.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The Wetness
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dealing with the wetness. If you ejaculate there may be
just a little liquid expelled or there could be a lot. If
you are intentionally squirting urine or ejaculate repeatedly,
there may be a liquid everywhere. Since you usually sleep
where you have sex, ejaculations can present a problem.
If you only ejaculate a little, simply keeping a couple
towels near the bed may be the solution. If you gush, then
towels may not be enough. Having a plastic cover on the mattress
and extra sheets may do the trick, though changing the sheets
and cleaning up may not be the way you want to relax after
sex. You can buy the bed pads hospitals use, just say you
are caring for a sick child or parent, as they are absorbent
and have a plastic backing. They are sometimes sold with
incontinence supplies at your local store as well. You
can try having sex in the tub or shower. Consider having
a second bed or an air mattress to have sex on. For women who
ejaculate every time, regardless of whether they want
too, cleanup can be bothersome at times, and does take some
getting use too. Just try to keep a positive attitude and
be prepared with extra towels and sheets. A supportive
partner always helps.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Real or Faked?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I hate to be the barer of bad news, but the chances are, the
women seen ejaculating in adult movies are most likely
urinating, not ejaculating. They are intentionally squirting
urine to simulate orgasm and true female ejaculation.
The proof of this is the shear volume they expel. True ejaculation
is almost impossible to capture on film, it is over in a blink
of an eye. Even in a video produced by women, titled 'How
to Female Ejaculate', features one woman who, while
appearing to be having real orgasms, is obviously squirting
urine, lots of urine, not just ejaculating. She does enjoy
herself immensely though, so it is entertaining to watch.
When I mentioned I thought this girl was urinating, not
ejaculating to the star and producer of this video, she
did not deny it. The other women in the video do appear to
actually ejaculate, and I highly recommend it to those
who want to learn how or to just see female ejaculation.
Enjoy mainstream ejaculation videos, but keep in the back
of your mind that it is all fantasy.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
From the May 2000 issue of Self magazine.
"Women ejaculate, too
There's more than one way to make a wet spot - in fact,
there's a whole camp of doctors who believe that all
women ejaculate when they have an orgasm. In one study from
Florida State University in Tallahassee, 82 percent of
women said they experienced a release of fluid at the moment
of orgasm. Haven't noticed this yourself? "Since
most women are lying on their backs during sex and the amount
of fluid is so small [about a teaspoon], it
sometimes doesn't come out, " explains Beverly
Whipple, professor at Rutgers University and president
of the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors
and Therapists. "But research has demonstrated
that all women ejaculate a substance through the urethra
that is not urine."
Keep leaning and upgrade youself friends!Be a better lover
to all members!
|
